Smith's Power Consulting

The REAL Reason Behind Your Ex's SWIFT Departure (And How to Get Your Ex Back)

June 27, 2023 Coach Smith Season 2 Episode 12
Smith's Power Consulting
The REAL Reason Behind Your Ex's SWIFT Departure (And How to Get Your Ex Back)
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Have you ever wondered why your ex left so quickly? Are you perplexed by their sudden change of heart, and most importantly, are you still hoping for a chance to rekindle that lost love and get your ex back? Join me in this video as we dive deep into the psychology behind swift breakups. We'll uncover the often-overlooked signals and decode the hidden dynamics that drive your partner away. By the end, you'll understand why your ex-partner left so suddenly and the role you may have played in it.

 It's a common misconception that words and gestures can lure your ex-partner back into your life. We emphasize the need to comprehend and speak the language of attraction, and to address the imbalance in your relationship. By doing this, you'll have the knowledge and the tools to handle a breakup maturely and effectively. So, don't miss out on this enlightening journey. Subscribe today, and become stronger - today.

Subscribe now to unlock powerful relationship and post-breakup recovery insights, and acquire valuable wisdom on the innovative, tactical approach to psychology that can benefit your personal growth and healing journey. To unlock the secrets to mend and reignite your relationship, get my "No Contact Guide" for FREE (valued at $30 in retail) and get answers to most of your questions about no contact: https://www.smithspowerconsulting.com/join-our-powerful-community

Savva Smith:

Why did they leave so fast? You two were happy together, making plans. You thought that one of the main goals in your life to find a partner with whom you would never be alone had been accomplished. And then, in a matter of a few days, they transformed into a different person, believing that all those years were wasted. Suddenly, they had different plans and felt they simply had to leave. Why? The ultimate revelation is that, in the mind of the person initiating the breakup, the separation occurs dozens, if not hundreds, of times. Before they finally decide to announce it to you and leave, they can spend months preparing themselves, finding one reason after another You're not attentive enough, you do not contribute to chores, you're not committed enough, you're boring, you take them for granted. You've changed. You're not the person they used to know. All of this serves to prepare the environment for the breakup and to reinforce their purely emotional and I want to underline this emotional decision to leave. So what determines the moment when they start contemplating a breakup? It mainly depends on two factors Firstly, the amount of imbalance in your relationship and, secondly, their personality. Depending on who you are in a relationship with, they might start considering a breakup even when the imbalance between you is minimal. However, you, still enchanted by them, do not notice the subtle signs of this imbalance. You think everything is fine and that you're moving forward together, but they are already losing attraction Because they physically cannot be drawn to someone who holds a weaker position in the relationship, someone who values the relationship more than they do and who is more invested than they are. For instance. With such a person, one or two conflicts where you're in the right but still apologize, can be enough for the imbalance to escalate dramatically, causing them to lose, let's say, half of the attraction they once had. And for us, this just couldn't happen. The breakup is a reality, but our minds cannot accept this as the truth. It's as if your partner left yet still belongs to you. We have departed, but they're still your person, your loved one. You still feel a sense of responsibility for them. You still think you're together. This is why it is so hard. The breakup occurred in reality, but in your mind you're still a couple. This inertia, this momentum of our minds refusing to accept the reality, is what makes it so painful. It can drag on for months and even years, and because of this momentum you think okay, this isn't serious. We've been together for half a year or 10 years, it doesn't matter. If I fix this one thing, they'll come back. They said I wasn't fit enough. If I start hitting the gym, they'll come back. In fact, if I do it quickly, maybe they'll return tomorrow. They claimed I wasn't committed enough. I'll show them, i'll buy them a gift or invite them on vacation And then they'll see. If they refuse, perhaps if I find logical reasons for them to return to me, that's when they'll come back. My ex simply doesn't understand. I've explained how beneficial it would be for us to be together. If you've ever had these thoughts, ask yourself the following question Did they need these reasons to be with you? at the beginning of your relationship, wasn't your mere presence enough to make them happy? And if you're here, i can say for certain at the beginning of your relationship, a single notification about a message from you was enough to bring them joy. Now they might have even blocked you at some point, especially if you pursued them after the breakup. Not a single gift, not a single word can restore what has been lost. If you've tried this, you know it only makes the situation worse. This is because attraction doesn't comprehend words. It doesn't understand them. Have you ever considered this? This might sound as a silly question. People who attempt to persuade their ex to return using words are essentially asking the ancient mechanisms of their brain to defy their natural operations. The limbic system physically cannot comprehend your reasoning. It doesn't care if your ex has left and you're trying to convince them to come back. The lizard brain smells weakness. It is antisex, anti-attraction. Returning to where we began, the attraction starts to fade before the breakup is even announced. If you are in a weaker position in your relationship, you do not notice it. You're optimistic, you think you're in love. You ignore all the signs your partner is showing. Meanwhile, in their mind, they experience the end of the relationship repeatedly. They're preparing. This is why they were ready and you were not. This is why, in most cases, when they leave, they experience relief, while you endure the greatest stress of your life. If you want to change this situation, to replay it, to reverse what happened and to bring back the joyful moments you once shared, you need to start speaking the language of attraction, to address the imbalance. If you address the imbalance, the attraction will begin to grow again. But how can we do that? It may sound now as an impossible task. Fortunately for us, the limbic system understands very simple yet powerful actions, and if you think about the most powerful action post-breakup, you'll discover the answer yourself. But I'm sure you already know this answer. You might just be hesitant to state it aloud and follow through it. The answer is walking the fuck away. This immediately addresses the imbalance. If, for some reason, you'd like to get them back, however, the optimal approach is to work towards preventing breakups entirely And to ensure that you need to learn how to interpret the signs your partner, consciously or unconsciously, gives you when they start to lose attraction. Now, if you want to improve your skills even further, join my community, subscribe and become stronger today.

❓ The big question: WHY?
💔 The hidden factors: why your EX left so quickly
💭 What determines the moment they start thinking about a BREAKUP
🚦 How we miss the WARNING signs
❌ WHY trying harder IS NOT the answer
🧠 WHY logic DOES NOT work in love
The mechanism of a "RAPID" BREAKUP
❤️ Turning the tables: how walking away can BRING THEM closer